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What I just sent to to ESPN about coverage by @ESPN_Omaha

June 22, 2011

Here’s the email I just sent to ESPN about coverage of last night’s game between the University of South Carolina Fighting Gamecock Chickens and some school from the ACC. I urge you to send in your own critique as well. They only give you 1000 characters to work with. I wish they’d limited Orel “Surgery” Hershiser and Robin Ventura “Highway” to the same number out loud.  For their next game, we’d be better served if they’d just show a live shot of Robin Ventura’s t-shirt and let Hershiser talk about…something…for three hours.

Dear ESPN:

I can sum up the broadcast team for last night’s CWS game in a single word: awful. Had someone actually used the word “awful” in the booth last night, however, we would have been ‘treated’ to an inning’s worth of ‘banter’ about how use of the word ‘awful’ contributed mightily to Robin Ventura’s record hitting streak, or perhaps how proper pronunciation of the word ‘awful’ helped Orel Hershiser get that extra little ‘oomph’ on his fastball. We would then have learned that ‘oomph’ was what Mike Piazza called his porn ‘stache, which he often barbered while using Robin Ventura’s t-shirt.

That red-haired guy would have mumbled something about the ’85 Royals.

Your crew sat through a complete dismantling of arguably the best team in the country and talked about – nothing.

If I’d been listening to the game while blindfolded, they could have been covering a yak rodeo for all the relevance they brought to the broadcast.

Please fix this by Friday.

Tim

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